My first crush in my life, aside from maybe a babysitter or two in my incredibly younger days, was Tanya in Kindergarten. It’s silly how I can still remember her name, yet I haven’t heard from her in over 12 years. She was everything a cute girl would be now: shy, pretty, and athletic, only she was all this as a 5 year old. Young Steve was incredibly into her, and even got into quite the bit of trouble vying for her attention.
One day on a school bus ride with a friend, the friend had announced his intention of also trying to gain the attention of this girl, which made Steve flood with anger, and Steve bit the kid as hard as he could in the shoulder. The bite left a bruise for over a week, and it was the only time ever that anyone saw him cry, but it certainly got him to back down on pursuing her.
Tanya reminds me of another girl I know today. It may just be simply because no matter how often I tried to get her attention and affection, it never truly worked for me. No matter what I did, it didn’t seem to be good enough, and surely never enough to get her to enjoy my company. It wasn’t my appearance back then to keep the connection from occurring, since I was skinny then, so it must be that apparently Kindergarteners aren’t equipped well to handle emotional baggage. Another similarity between the present girl I’ve found myself jumping through hoops for and Tanya, is that Tanya left school after Kindergarten and I never saw her again, and my leaving high school in the current year of 2010, and there runs a chance of me never being able to see her again.
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